The 36th Blogger of Shaolin

Shaolin shadow blogging and the Wu Tang sword style

46 notes

It’s October, where you can go out and have people in costumes terrify the fuck out of you by chasing you down with masks and weapons.
Or, as the peaceful protestors in Ferguson call it, “just another evening.”

Filed under Ferguson

4 notes

rigs83-stuff asked: Are you doing anything for this "Day of Dredd"

Nah. I think “Dredd” is overrated.

8 notes

Anonymous asked: I want to watch undisputed 2 because I think white and adkins are amazing. Should I watch the first Undisputed before? Also could you recommend any Japanese martial arts films?

Noooooo. Avoid the first film. It’s not terrible but it’s far from a must-see. Stick with the second one and you’ll be just fine.
I haven’t watched an awful lot of Japanese martial arts films to be honest. I’ve mostly seen Chinese martial arts films with Japanese elements and actors…like “The Wrath of Vajra.” You might want to take a look at “Black Belt” too.
The Japanese don’t really do out-and-out martial arts films. They usually delve into swordplay and such. I just got my hands on the first live action “Rurouni Kenshin” film so I’m looking forward to watching that.

Of course, there will probably a dozen or so notes on this post recommending Japanese martial arts films (you all love to prove me wrong, you bastards!) so you might want to check back.

93 notes

Oh nothing, it’s just Maggie Cheung giving a denim clad Jackie Chan a piggyback.
Look at Maggie Cheung’s face. There is nothing more adorable than young Maggie Cheung. God didn’t rest on the seventh day, he created young Maggie Cheung’s cherubic cheeks out of a the purest baby otter joy.True story: Young Maggie Cheung was once hiking in scenic hills of rural China where, out of nowhere, she was approached by a snarling grizzly bear. A huge mammoth fucker of a bear it was, with blood lust in its eyes and massively pendulous bear balls.Instead of running, young Maggie Cheung stood in place and stared into those savage, onyx eyeballs. Instead of screaming, she gently smiled, her cheeks literally bending the fabric of reality like Neo in “The Matrix.”
What happened after that? I’ll tell you what happened. That grizzly bear? He’s now a youth pastor in Wilmington, Delaware.

Oh nothing, it’s just Maggie Cheung giving a denim clad Jackie Chan a piggyback.

Look at Maggie Cheung’s face. There is nothing more adorable than young Maggie Cheung. God didn’t rest on the seventh day, he created young Maggie Cheung’s cherubic cheeks out of a the purest baby otter joy.
True story: Young Maggie Cheung was once hiking in scenic hills of rural China where, out of nowhere, she was approached by a snarling grizzly bear. A huge mammoth fucker of a bear it was, with blood lust in its eyes and massively pendulous bear balls.
Instead of running, young Maggie Cheung stood in place and stared into those savage, onyx eyeballs. Instead of screaming, she gently smiled, her cheeks literally bending the fabric of reality like Neo in “The Matrix.”

What happened after that? I’ll tell you what happened. That grizzly bear? He’s now a youth pastor in Wilmington, Delaware.

Filed under Maggie Cheung Jackie Chan Piggyback

14 notes

Anonymous asked: Have you ever seen Merantau directed by Gareth Evans. I've only seen the fight scenes on youtube looks pretty good.

Yep, it’s great. It’s a slower film than, say, “The Raid” and definitely takes a while to get going, but it really is a great movie with some vastly underrated fight scenes.

10 notes

varmalusthemalicious asked: I've seen a lot of crappy Chuck Norris movies, but I hear people saying that he's made some gems. I loved Invasion USA, but that's about as far as my love for the Chuck goes. Are there any films of his you would recommend? Martial Arts, action, any genre?

Short answer…no.

Chuck Norris is shit. His filmography can probably be mined for hilarious cheesiness but I’d never actually recommend any of his films. I guess he’s okay in “Way of the Dragon” but everything else I’ve seen with him in has been god awful. Hell, he was even the worst thing about “The Expendables 2.”

He’s also a racist and homophobe so that makes him even more of a giant bag of twats.

39 notes

Anonymous asked: Best michael jai white movie?

I’ll tell you which one isn’t his best…

Toxic Avenger…

In my opinion, his best film is “Black Dynamite.” It might not be his best when it comes to action, but he was born to play that role and the entire film, except maybe the end, it comedy gold.

10 notes

varmalusthemalicious asked: Do you recommend the 5 deadly venoms?

Yes and no. Yes because it’s a certified classic and one hell of a film. It’s worth seeing just to be able to say you’ve seen it.
No because it’s not all that fight heavy. It plays way more like a mystery than a kung fu film. Of course, there are fights and the finale is pretty stupendous, but it’s not a balls to the wall fight-fest.

But yes, you should see it. Everyone should. It’s wonderfully directed and a genuinely solid movie.
If you like your kung fu films a little sillier and action filled, I’d go for a few other Venoms films over this one.